I haven’t spoken to you or thought about you in over a year. Why now? I simply could not care less about what you’re up to or how you’re doing. You broke me twice. You said you didn’t mean to the first time, but by the second time it was a joke. I know I’m safe this time though, because you are the reason I’m the strong, walled up woman I am today.
My grandfather is having life threatening surgery, I’m a mess, and my so-called “friends” have been ignoring me and haven’t said one word of reassurance. And I’m just so sad and disappointed that Brian is the only person who cares and tries to keep my mood up. I’m grateful that he’s trying, but I wish Erin and Emily cared in the slightest.
It never ceases to amaze me how shitty and uncaring the people I call best friends treat me. Friend after friend, time after time. Pushed to the side and seen right through, treated as if I weren’t even there, invisible.
As friends step back and I draw closer to the end of The Virgin Suicides, I see what’s missing in my story that also lacks in theirs
So I work in a frozen yogurt store. Today my coworker walked to the back of the store by the kind of hidden away public area and found a boy fingering his girlfriend. They were like 14. I have absolutely no faith in humanity from this moment on.
Looking back at the past 4 years and I’ve digressed in every possible way. I just feel completely and totally chewed and spit out by this whole system and I am so besides myself.
I’m always searching for someone’s approval. At the end of the day for the past couple of months, even years, it’s been for my brother’s approval. And I’m kinda just realizing that as many times I try to do what he asks, try my hardest to get a laugh out of him, or even just get a simple smile to let me know he’s there. I don’t think he’ll ever see me as anything more than an annoying little sister that he needs to protect from boys. He’s leaving for college again tomorrow and he ruined the past two nights with his temper and I’m gonna miss him so much. It’s gonna be so weird without him around. I just wish things could be different.
Now imagine a world where your friends are actually loyal……
…. Just kidding I figured out my prom date sent me the letters
You all fucking suck, I already have it all planned out and I might actually go through with it this time, I even have my letters written and things laid out.